This post contains affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, I may earn a small commission from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you. I only recommend products I genuinely believe are helpful for families.
Big feelings are a normal part of childhood: tantrums, frustrations, worry, disappointment, overwhelm, and so much more. As parents, our goal isn’t to stop our children from having big emotions; it’s to help them navigate and learn how to manage them.
As the parent of three children — one who often feels overwhelmed by very big emotions — one of our favorite ways to support emotional regulation is with her very own Calm Down Corner.
Despite the name, a Calm Down Corner isn’t about sending children away when they’re upset. Rather, it’s about creating a cozy, inviting space where they can pause, regulate, and reconnect with themselves before returning to play or problem-solving.
The best part? You don’t need an entire room or an expensive setup. A small corner with a few thoughtfully chosen tools can make a big difference.
Think of a Calm Down Corner as an emotional toolbox. Instead of telling your children to go to their room until they calm down, they can go to their calm corner (on their own, or with a grown-up) and figure out what their body and mind need to feel soothed.
Over time, this helps children:
The goal isn’t to eliminate emotions — emotions are a healthy part of being a human — but to help children navigate and feel less overwhelmed by them.
You can set up your Calm Down Corner for kids anywhere you want! Look for a quiet spot in your home, such as:
You can add simple things, like a soft rug, bean bag, floor pillow, or cozy blanket, to make the space feel welcoming rather than punitive. This is meant to be an area kids want to go!
There are so many different ideas for what to add to your child(ren)’s Calm Down Corner. They can even weigh in on some of their favorite items, too! Here are some things we’ve had in ours over the years:
Children can’t express emotions they don’t have words for.
Simple feelings posters help kids identify what they’re experiencing and build emotional vocabulary over time.
I love these Calming Corner Feelings Posters (great for home and classrooms, too!)
Sometimes children know they’re upset, but not why.
A feelings wheel helps them move beyond “mad” or “sad” to identify more specific emotions.
I like this feelings wheel for younger kids (think pre-school and kindergarten), and one like this for older children (elementary and middle schoolers)
This is one of my favorite calming tools.
Kids simply expand and contract the ball while taking slow breaths, giving their bodies an easy visual cue for deep breathing. All my kids love this (and so do I!!).
There are many different varieties, so choose what you and your kids like best. We have this one.
Deep pressure can feel incredibly calming for many children.
A weighted stuffed animal offers comfort while helping children feel grounded during overwhelming moments. My daughter likes to sleep with hers, and lay it on her tummy when she’s upset.
Watching glitter and little balls slowly settle naturally encourages children to slow their own breathing.
Sensory bottles are simple but surprisingly effective. We have a bunch of these in our Calm Down Corner. Kids can also make their own!
Some children regulate best through movement.
A few quiet fidgets can help restless hands while the brain settles.
Choose a small variety instead of filling the space with dozens of toys. My daughter keeps these in her Calm Down Corner, but also carries some with her in a little case wherever we go (and I do mean wherever!).
Our favorites are the Dumpling squishies, stress cubes, theFube Fidget Cube, and the Slow Rising Butter (why do kids love this so much?!).
These are wonderful because they give children concrete ideas when they’re overwhelmed. You can purchase some, but you can also easily make your own! Sit down with your child at a time when they’re calm, and do this activity together. Talk about things you can each do when you’re feeling upset or overwhelmed. Ideas might include:
If you’re looking for a pre-made pack of Calm Down Cards, here’s a deck we like (great to take on-the-go, also).
Sometimes children need to know that calming down doesn’t last forever.
A visual timer helps them see time passing without constantly asking, “Am I done yet?”
This is the one we use.
For children who become overwhelmed by noise or sensory input, these can be incredibly helpful.
They create a quieter environment that allows kids to reset more easily.
My kids all like these — they are also helpful when thunderstorms get loud!
Books can help children understand big feelings in a way that simply talking about them can’t. We turn to books for everything in our home!!
Some wonderful choices include:
Try to avoid turning the Calm Down Corner into another play area. Items you’ll want to skip include:
Remember: the goal is calm, not entertainment.
Introduce the Calm Down Corner before your child is upset.
Explore the tools together.
Practice using the breathing ball.
Read books in the space.
Talk about emotions during calm moments.
The more familiar the space becomes, the more likely your child will choose to use it when big feelings show up.
Remember: children often need us beside them before they can learn to calm themselves. Co-regulation comes before self-regulation, so you may need to join your child in their Calm Down Corner at first.
Remember that big feelings aren’t bad — we all have them! They’re opportunities to teach lifelong emotional skills and become more self-aware.
A Calm Down Corner won’t stop every meltdown, but it can become a safe place where your child learns that emotions are welcome, mistakes are okay, and calming down is a skill that gets stronger with practice.
Good luck!!!
Share
This book is PERFECT for perfectionists (children and grown-ups!) and belongs in classrooms, libraries, and every child’s bookshelf.
Share
Stella’s Brave Voice follows the twins from The Only Me and has earned a 5-star Book Review Award from Litpick and Reader’s Favorite.
Share
The Only Me was named one of the top 100 indie children’s books of 2022 by Kirkus Reviews and earned a 5-star Book Review Award from Litpick.
We don’t spam! By signing up, you agree to get emails from Marissa Bader.
To ensure you receive my emails make sure to add marissa@marissabader.com to your contacts or list of safe senders. You can unsubscribe at any time.
A PDF download will be sent to your inbox.
We don’t spam! By signing up, you agree to get emails from Marissa Bader.
To ensure you receive my emails make sure to add marissa@marissabader.com to your contacts or list of safe senders. You can unsubscribe at any time.
A PDF download will be sent to your inbox.
We don’t spam! By signing up, you agree to get emails from Marissa Bader.
To ensure you receive my emails make sure to add marissa@marissabader.com to your contacts or list of safe senders. You can unsubscribe at any time.
