Since the birth of the twins I’ve been having a tough time deciding what to do with my life. I mean, aside from what I feel is one of the most important tasks currently at hand: raising three uniquely tempered little individuals.
To be clear, I wanted this pregnancy. Deeply and passionately. I was so ready to give our then toddler a sibling – a lifelong confidante and playmate. But twins? Twins was definitely not on the radar.
As we find ourselves immersed in this thing called parenthood, we may have temporarily forgotten ourselves. We may have gotten off our track–or perhaps found a NEW and more fitting track. We may be struggling to keep ourselves and marriages afloat while also keeping our wee ones alive, happy and thriving. We may have put careers on hold; future plans on standby. We may be worried that we will never get ourselves back–the pre-baby self that was young, carefree, spontaneous and fun. I see you. I feel you. I am you.
And hear me: this is where we are supposed to be. This is a phase of life – an amazing phase (if we allow ourselves to see it as such). It’s a short time-frame, one in which those babies and little ones need and want us more than anyone else in the Universe. When they see us, they are awe-struck; as if we are famous musicians strolling through our own homes. And hear this too: we haven’t lost ourselves. We are just emerging, as we always are, into new, different, and perhaps even better versions of ourselves. As we are doing all the time – have done since they moment we ourselves were born – we are evolving. So we have not necessarily lost anything – we are just shifting. We are finding our way to a new normal; a normal that will forever and always be changing as long as we are here, flipping through the ascending chapters of our lives.
I write these words because I need to read them, hear them and believe them. But deep in my soul, I know them to be true. I may not know exactly what my future holds, but that’s okay. None of us does. Life is always unpredictable…off the cuff. And the life I’m currently living? It’s full of blessings and joy. I simply wouldn’t have it any other way.